I remember being told in my initial cabin crew training that passengers leave their brains at home. My trainees and I giggled and thought no more of it. But once we gained our wings it didn’t take long in to our career to realise that NOTHING our beloved passengers do when travelling will shock you. We have literally seen it all.
So what’s the worst thing people can do on a plane?
Well there’s quite a list to be honest.
Anything that involves personal grooming is a big no no. I’ve witnessed passengers cutting nails and trimming/waxing body hair from various places.
Do not go in to that lavatory with no shoes of socks on – that’s not water on the floor believe me.
Do not try and join the mile high club or even the half mile high club (that’s masturbating) something I once caught a passenger doing who was seated in between two other poor unsuspecting passengers.
Don’t change your babies in the seat row go to the toilet and use the baby changing facilities provided.
And while we’re on the subject of toilets please use them like any normal civilised person would, wash your hands, use the flush and don’t leave your sh*tty tissues or sanitary towels in the sink. I remember a passenger en-route to Manchester, changing her sanitary towel while still sat at her seat while other passengers looked on stunned. She had no shame or dignity. She then proceeded to hand over the used one to the crew as if it were an empty crisp packet.
My biggest personal pet peeve (aside from those we’ve discussed above) has to be passengers with no manners. It really doesn’t cost anything to acknowledge us when we welcome you onboard and wish you good morning. It’s ok to say please when you ask for a tea or coffee and say thank you when we hand it over to you. Say excuse me when you need to get our attention instead of poking or prodding us or clicking your fingers at me.
The worst behaviour I have witnessed personally onboard a flight has to involve passengers who are under the influence of alcohol or drugs and sadly here in the UK it’s becoming a very common occurrence.
I remember being in the rear galley one morning when a passenger pressed the call bell. As I approached the seat row I was immediately struck by an overpowering smell of vomit. When I arrived the passenger who had pressed the call light who was sat in the window seat pointed to the passenger seated in the aisle seat. Said passenger was sat with his head on the tray-table and the tray-table was covered in vomit. My initial reaction was obviously concern for the passenger thinking that he was unwell. My concern quickly turned to anger when I began to ask the young man some questions and he proceeded to tell me to ‘f*ck off’. Turned out the passenger had been on a weekend away with his friends and had somewhat overindulged. I asked the guy to get up and go and clean himself up in the toilet but he was that out of it he literally couldn’t move. All we could do was move the poor passengers seated around them and give the guy some wipes and tell himself to clean himself up. He didn’t of course.
Passengers under the influence can also be very abusive towards crew. I have been verbally attacked on numerous occasions ands now many crew who have also been physically attacked.
The weirdest thing I’ve been asked to do, well how long have you got!
Over the years i’ve had passengers ask me if there are runways in the ocean “Just incase we have to crash when flying over the sea”.
I’ve had people ask where the ‘safe room’ is on the aircraft, because “Cabin crew always survive plane crashes”.
Or the time when a gentleman asked me if I could ask the pilot to fly lower as his wife was scared of heights!
A passenger once asked me if we had any crystal meth as she had blocked sinuses! I think (I hope) she meant menthol crystals.
A few years ago, I had a woman ask me if I could give her an enema. I told her that unfortunately we didn’t have any on board. She replied “Oh that’s okay, i’ve brought my own”. Only now I realised she wanted ME to give her the enema. No. No, I don’t think so!
So what’s the worst thing people have ever done on one of your flights? Pop yours in the comments below.
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